A Stormy Voyage on Starship OS/2 Warp

A Stormy Voyage on Starship OS/2 Warp

By Stephen Manes
The New York Times

October 24, 1994

The International Business Machines Corp. has historically displayed tenacious self-delusion in sticking with "technically superior" products long after the wider world has found them wanting. OS/2 Warp, the eighth edition of IBM's operating system (and therefore dubbed "version 3") is but the latest in a hapless line that includes Micro Channel Architecture hardware and the mercifully forgotten software called Topview.

Perhaps because, like Star Trek, OS/2 has a fanatical band of adherents with too much time on their hands, this version tips its hat to the Starship Enterprise. Trying it put me in mind of a different mythological vessel: the ghostly Flying Dutchman, condemned to haunt the seas and lure other ships to their doom.

First released in 1987, OS/2 took a long time to grab anchor, mostly in corporate ports where its features were particularly useful. But since Microsoft Windows from the Microsoft Corporation trounced it in the broader marketplace, relatively few packaged "native" OS/2 programs emerged.

IBM boasts of "over 2,000" of them, but that counts narrowly focused products from such unfamiliar sources as Hockware Inc. and Frenster Associates. SmartSuite, from the better-known Lotus Development Corp., is the only integrated collection of native OS/2 office applications; it lacks elements of its Windows counterpart and has not been updated as regularly or as recently. Lately OS/2 has begun running Windows in order to survive, but even IBM computers generally ship with Windows, not OS/2.

Now IBM is spending tens of millions of dollars to sell OS/2 as a consumer product. At about $80, Warp is positioned as a sort of Windows Helper, with a grab bag of programs thrown in.

Since typical consumers will find few native applications, OS/2 has in essence become a Windows utility, but a big, fat one that insists on running the show. It does little to improve IBM's reputation for writing wretched personal computer software.

Curses and blasphemy worthy of the Dutchman's captain roiled the seas of "Easy Installation." Since CD-ROM's were not yet available, I foolishly chose to install the program from 21 floppy disks, plus 14 more for the "Bonus Pack," plus (unmentioned until you open the box) Windows floppy disks, which you must find or create even if Windows is installed on your hard drive. At one point, the manual instructs you to "Press PF4." IBM terminals have a key marked PF4; personal computers do not.

The diskette shuffle took about an hour on a very fast machine. It almost worked. Fifteen minutes after I selected the wrong video software, the program informed me that: "The installed adapter does not support the selected display driver. Do you wish to continue?" The only options were "OK" and "Cancel." Neither one helped.

A toll-free customer service number comes in the box. What it gets you, after three levels of voice menus, is the number in area code 407 you needed in the first place.

IBM staffs this line with people fluent in company argot. "Is that the GA version?" I was asked, but luckily knew that meant "General Availability." Later the customer servant stumped me with a "PMR."

"PMR?"

"Problem Record Number."

"Wouldn't that be PRN?"

"The PM stands for problem."

And there were PM's aplenty. Every time the machine started, the screen displayed messages like "SYS1195: The statement 'STACKS' on line 75 of the CONFIG.SYS file is not recognized. Line 75 is ignored." Warp evidently merged part of a DOS file into one of its own. IBM's technicians could not explain why.

Or why the Microsoft Office toolbar keeps appearing on the OS/2 desktop but refuses to work. Or why, given that Warp boasts of running multiple programs at once, normally stable Windows programs crashed repeatedly and corrupted icons when I tried them while running Warp's endless Internet installation program, which eventually died, too. At least the entire system didn't go down, one technician proudly explained, thereby demonstrating OS/2's "crash protection."

Oh.

The technical superiority IBM claims for Warp is suspect. With OS/2, Windows performance drops: a standard disk benchmark ran only two-thirds as fast as usual. Windows programs can still harm each other unless a standard setting is changed. Incompatibilities abound. And although "preemptive multitasking" should not allow an individual program to hog the system, programs often do just that.

IBM touts Warp's built-in Internet capabilities, which were not available for preview. No matter how wonderful they may prove to be, they cannot be worth giving your machine over to a new operating system that creates new headaches. Besides, IBM plans to offer similar Internet software for Windows by the end of the year.

With its own interface and its own peculiar ways, Warp adds needless complexity and a needless learning curve. Software drivers for printers and displays are hard enough to deal with in Windows, but OS/2 requires drivers of its own.

Many are supplied with the program; many are not, particularly for the newest products. A lack of drivers for the video card in my test machine limited it to a single video mode that effectively ruled out multimedia. I finally used the "dual-boot" feature to return to plain old DOS and Windows, which, though no great fan of either, I was delighted to do.

Unfortunately, Warp had mucked them up a bit. Even more unfortunately, it is neither polite enough nor smart enough to uninstall itself fully. This demon frigate may haunt the hard disk for eternity.

Memo to IBM: Please complete your deal for a fresh start with Apple. Let Apple write the software. Then scuttle this leaky scow, live long and prosper.